Fuck War, Fuck More
Photo by Zoltan Tasi
Capitalism and our industrial society rob us of the little time we have to live, and all the pleasures life offers us. I don’t understand anger, hatred, fighting, or war. There are far better options to spend one’s time, but somehow, we always choose conflict over pleasure, which, in my opinion, is common sense. There is so much sex to be had, and plenty of it! So, why? Why would you want to fight or go to war when you could be engaged in good sex instead? Seriously! Think about it. If someone you find sexually attracted to asked you if you wanted to fuck or fight somebody who made you angry, which action would you prefer? Well, unless you’re a monk, you’re going to choose fucking.
Humans are the only species that can have sex with a wide variety of other animals (as well as inanimate objects). You can fuck each other, fuck horses, camels, dogs, kangaroos, and squirrels if you want. How many times have you heard news stories about dogs getting stuck inside women, or men getting their dicks stuck inside of vacuum hoses? We’re having sex, yes, but it’s not enough. We need to fuck more, fuck more frequently, and fuck until the streets run white, rather than red. Citizens of the world should fuck wherever possible even if others are present. The worst that can happen is you’ll get a ticket and maybe a day or two in jail, but who cares? Having had sex in public before and in full view of others is a pleasure I’ve been fortunate to have had on several occasions. Find yourself a consenting (and legal) companion, shed those pesky pleasure-limiting inhibitions, and find spaces that have enough room for you to handle your business. It could be on a bus, subway, department store, your desk, or an elevator. Just do it and damn the consequences.
I don’t understand how racists and Conservatives (am I being redundant?) prefer to lose their minds over someone just being. Seriously. They fret over the color of someone’s skin, their sexuality, gender, or their culture, even though it doesn’t affect them in any way, shape, or form. They don’t realize that they’re in their own way of enjoying life more in a way that’s almost insane to imagine.
Police. Stop beating and killing black men. Just keep fucking whoever you’re fucking at home, or beat your meat instead of beating your woman when you can’t.
More than anyone else, our politicians who send our children off to war need to stop fucking us in the ass without our consent, lubrication, or the courtesy of a reach-around. Politicians should have their romantic and sexual histories thoroughly vetted. The more they fuck, the less likely they are to start a war. We want candidates who are sexually satisfied instead of angry and sexually frustrated, and they should be chosen based on their fucking record. If they’ve had great sex, had lots of it, and are generally happy, they get chosen to be a candidate. The more you fuck, the happier you’ll be and the happier your citizens will be because they’ll have more time to fuck because there will be no more wars (plus, the fewer dead people there are, the more people to fuck!). You can’t think about squabbling or war because you’ll always have fucking on your mind.
scene from Nukitashi: The Animation
Lastly, soldiers in our military should be retrained and charged with training others how to please themselves and each other sexually instead. They’ll be tasked with scouring the planet searching for anti-sex forces and making the enemies of sexual pleasure surrender to their sexual desires. Planned Parenthood could even work with the military, providing them with contraceptives and counseling.
So be a true patriot and citizen of the world; fuck war and fuck more! (feel free to steal that for use in your campaign slogan).
